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People write diaries. Their diaries describe their personality. I write on my blog. It describes me way too well. :D
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Everyone writes. From the ink of their thoughts, by the pen of their mind on the page of their face. Everyone writes.I love to write. It is a passion; a compulsion; something that gives me an avenue to express myself. I write when I am happy; when I am sad or when an issue touches my heart. I find inspiration to write in every aspect of life.
This blog is dedicated to anything and everything that fills my thoughts and occupies cranial space

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Compromise

COMPROMISE such a big word and why not it had to adjust a lot of letters to ensure it got some meaning. It must have got inspired by our governments who shake hands in any direction with all ideologies to ensure that they sit on the right side of the speaker. Compromise is omnipresent. It is present in plenty.
Everyone has to compromise at various important junctures of their life. When a child is born, The child's toys are always given to him based on the next best alternative available needless to say we start with "the best" and initiate the process of applying the next best till we reach the most economical and declare to the child that nothing's best than this. The child cries but accepts, compromise is a big word and encompasses the child too in its domain.
The child grows and hits the circumference of his adolescence. Takes his heavy school bag with the same heaviness feeling in the heart to a school he was reluctant to join as his best friend, that dimpled pink chin Pinky, was going in "that" school. Throughout his adolescence adventures he will have to have the next best girls or boys as compared to "that" school.  He will try his best to make the most of the resources available but his heart will always swell at the compromise his parents made at his expense. The seed of discontent will spread its roots in all direction and he will look for solace in everyone except his parents.
The fruit ripens and the child enters the free world through the college gate. Suddenly the canvas of life becomes so big and millions of opportunities beckon upon him. He goes for an opportunity named "the cute smiling girl" though she hardly smiles and is on the wrong side of cute, hence whenever she blesses the world with her smile its construed to be "cute". The love birds throw cautions to the wind and float in the merry currents of  buoyant air till it looses its thrust and brings them down face down to the surface. He fell in love with a girl, whom he thinks is perfect for him. For a while he thinks that at last compromise have taken a break, but the girl for whom he is everything, falls in love with another guy. Ah! It again started. He again compromised himself for the happiness of that girl. He now wishes to forgot that earlier compromise by looking for another perfect girl.
But things not get over here. The "mummy" and "papa" have known that their dear child is doing a mistake. A large set of people (called family by outer stretches of imagination) cluster into a small room to advise (read brainwash) the child. He is asked his opinion and kept on being asked till he concurs. No "next best" will do for him as the girl has to come in the family, only best will be required.  The child as has become habitual, compromises and marries "that" girl as the only best thing. Everyone celebrates but for the child whose heart is still heavy (the school bag hangs large on his heart). Poor child had thought freedom meant the power of "choice" never realized it meant the power to say "yes" when you have to say "no". And the child is now part of a big happy family only he being unhappy.
The next rounds of compromises and no doubt they are of perpetual nature start as he starts settling down in the family finally. The dreams land on the earth of reality. The wife lays down "n" number of options for him to agree with her. Being a family now he again starts compromising for them by reducing the expenditures he used to do on his hobbies Whatever he chooses he has to agree to disagree. He has to maintain a balance (Read Compromise) between parents and his wife so that both the parties remain happy and fulfilled. Compensation for a compromise was huge this time, with the same heavy heart (school bag is a constant companion!).
To conclude, no matter which phase of your life you are going through or where you are compromise is as essential as fresh air. Learn to live with it as you can't live without it. See you have compromised. Compromise a little bit more by commenting on this post.
Thanks

5 comments:

  1. Compromising when you are a kid, is understandable. But compromising as an adult is not right.According to me as an adult if you compromise it shows that you have no will to fight for the right or for the best.

    You write exceptionally well. I think you can freelancing as a career option

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  2. sorry to disagree
    but even as adult compromising is not wrong
    many times these are the circumstances which drives you to a point where you have no other option except to compromise
    and relations only work well on compromises

    Thanks a lot, will definitely think over it:)

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  3. As much I would like to agree with you Ankit, I cannot.
    As an adult, if we compromise, it just means that we are afraid to let our voice out. Let me take the example you gave, if the parents insist on getting the perfect girl for the family, convince them the girl you wish is perfect, because if you can't, you are voluntarily giving it up and unloading your guilt on that one word compromise. Going back, if the 'perfect' girl falls for another guy, it does not mean you are compromising, it means your definition of perfect for you wasn't as correct as you thought.

    Having said that, it is but a fact that we all DO compromise a lot because it is an inbuilt part of our conditioning since we grew up. We also do it to avoid arguments as it is normal human thought (though incorrect) that it is better to cave in and avoid a fight than have one. I am not immune to it and nor is anyone I know. But then, this is not how it should be.

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    Replies
    1. You are right Janhvi
      the perfect girl falls for another guy... i know that my definition of perfect was not right but even for that imperfect girl's happiness you compromise yourself because you cant see her sad...

      Delete

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