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People write diaries. Their diaries describe their personality. I write on my blog. It describes me way too well. :D
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Everyone writes. From the ink of their thoughts, by the pen of their mind on the page of their face. Everyone writes.I love to write. It is a passion; a compulsion; something that gives me an avenue to express myself. I write when I am happy; when I am sad or when an issue touches my heart. I find inspiration to write in every aspect of life.
This blog is dedicated to anything and everything that fills my thoughts and occupies cranial space

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Who is to be blamed?

"I don't fear my government. I fear my fellow citizens."

Forgive me if I’ve already offended you with this beginning of this post, but Yes after hearing of some things from the past this is what I feel now. Hearing of corruption and all each day didn't bothered me much. But recent rape case, the delhi case made me think again of where am I living... India of which we are proud of our sanskriti and respect to others. No not at all. I felt outraged. I was forced to think once again that India is the name of a land where women are taught to wear clothes sensibly , to maintain distance from other sex , to avoid roaming around after sunset. But men are not taught to respect the women kind. I am living in a civilization full of double standards. To summarize things , we are the only culture that hails women as goddesses in temples. But no one needs to feel proud of that, for that's just till nightfall. After that we want them on our beds.

And when I heard of the incident of the horrifying shooting in Connecticut I felt that because of the inescapable reach of media, mass killings affect virtually everyone. While the victims and the ones who loved them suffer terribly, the rest of us may feel a combination of many emotions: grief (through empathy), fear, disbelief, curiosity, fascination, and even a thrill at seeing the commotion caused by what happened. Each horrific event puts us on a new emotional binge.But that's natural because at the same time, "We" love to feel sorry for people and their lost ones. We love to have something to feel bad about.

After shootings like the one in Newtown, the media descend excitedly on the crime scene, and the public tunes in to see and hear the latest details. It’s like rubbernecking at the site of an accident on the highway; we do it because we want to, either to satisfy curiosity or to fulfill some visceral need for morbid stimulation. Then we find out about the killer and the circumstances of the murders, and we argue righteously about how our society has to change. Doing this may actually make us feel good.

But the main question which arises is that who is to be blamed for all this. Yes I too want to play the blame game as everyone else plays after such and everyone is playing till today. Just like after the Delhi rape case there's a blame war raging. The BJP's blaming the Congress. The Congress is blaming it's Police force.The police force is blaming the society. The society is blaming the party in power. And so, like passing the parcel, everyone's shifting their baggage of responsibility to the next person.

Have we ever thought who is Behind a Rapist :- Behind every rapist is he himself who could not control his beastly emotions but he is not the only one. Because, behind every rapist, - is a Father who treated his wife as a slave. - is a Mother who meekly followed her husbands whims. - is a Sister who kept quite or even supported her brother who harassed other girls. - is a friend who thought it is cool to tease a girl and even cooler to rape her. - is a Grandmother who sees her newborn Grand-daughter and gets depressed. - is In-laws who harasses their daughter-in-law for dowry. - is Education System which offers advanced courses of Physics, Chemistry and Biology but doesn't offer basics on sex education. - is a TV serial where female lead is devising plans of consummation of her marriage even when she knows her husband loves somebody else. - is a Novel which portrays weakness of a woman as her sacrifice for her family and her meekness as a virtue. - is a Patriarchal System which preaches that woman has little to none rights in decision-making. - is alcohol/drugs which makes one insane. - is News Channel which broadcasts rape news as an entertainment. - is a Politician who thinks that child marriage will solve the rape problem. - is a Lawmaker who came up with biased laws against the victim. - is a Legal System which has a provision for rape victim to marry her rapist. - is a Society which over-rates sex and takes pride in depicting woman as a sexual object.
....and in the end, behind every rapist is Me and You who shout at top of our lungs "Castrate, Life Imprison, Hang in Public, Burn, Cut one hand and a leg of a rapists" for 5 days and then forget everything and get on with our life.

No amount of body covering will reduce the rape counts. Its not the clothes that is filthy but the mindset of men that is and no amount of praying will change it. I feel that things like length of clothes, drunkard males, safe states are just statistical detours good for debates and maybe presentations , but they will never find a SOLUTION. I don't think drunk people think about laws when passed out in alcoholic intoxication. Seen a million of them. Dhananjay Chatterjee was hanged. Did it do any good? This rape seems like a consequence of letting out a few carnivores into the open. What happens when you unleash a few animals who've starved for flesh since ages onto a pile of meat ?? You don't call the "meat" guilty for being so tempting or attractive or even "tasty"

I think that behind these incidents culprits, politicians, the police, the family, our culture and the general public all are at equal fault.

POLITICIANS and GOVERNMENT- It’s not the first time it has happened in India, estimates say every 20 minutes a girl is raped in this country. So why are they creating a hue and cry now. They should have come up with the law the very first time a girl was raped, wasn't rape a crime then??? They instead of finding any solution to the problem are giving comments that are not only unacceptable but also at the same time shameful. I would like to mention some of them--

Don't live in India - Migrate to Bharat instead.
(RSS Chief Mohan Bhagwat)

Don't go out with boys in the night.
(Abu Azmi of Samajwadi Party).

Don't cross Maryada
(MP Minister Kailash Vijayvargiya)

Perform puja to put "stars" in correct "position".
(Chhattisgarh Home Minister Nanki Ram Kanwar)

and our intelligent ministers who said, in order to feel safe, the women should learn martial art and carry pepper spray. Ms./Mr. Minister - How about you carrying the pepper spray in your pocket? And let go those policemen and security guards who guard you as if you are the next Kohinoor? The number of cops and Rapid Action Force units, the government installed the other day at the India gate, is good enough to implement law and order in Delhi. Only if they are not busy taking care of you or dropping your kid or grandchildren to the school and if nothing else then buying your vegetables. Because the moment you talk about pepper spray, to me you mean that you haven't been able to do your job of making the people feel safe.

POLICE- Okay this news have made it to the front cover what about the rest and who are the rapist... were they caught and punished. The rich rapists go free only the poor ones make it to the news papers.

FAMILY: - In a conservative, less educated household a woman is nothing more than a lady who's supposes to do what she's told. Domestic Violence is an epidemic and widespread predominantly against women. Around 70% of the women are victims of domestic violence. Women are said to bear with all atrocities silently that makes them prone to rape, domestic violence and even dowry deaths.
We all know what will happen now, every mother will be making her girl understand to be more careful, like don't go out in the night, don't hang out late after this incident but no mother will make her son understand not to see any girl in that way. and atleast start respecting girls.

EDUCATION: - How many of us has had sex education. It’s not a compulsory subject in school. Schools and colleges hardly pay any attention to it.
What if the right education was given to the one who have taken 28 innocent lifes, including the one of his own mother. He must be told killing someone is not a solution to any problem. There are many other solutions to the problem you have and even killing someone would not solve the purpose. It only makes the problem bigger, nothing else.

MOVIES and TV:  I blame the movies for our current plight. All women centric movies are about sex. Be it Fashion, Dirty picture, Heroine, Aiyya. Women shows-off and the movie sell. The movies that doesn't have very important women roles have item numbers where they have double meaning songs, very vulgar moves and very exposed women examples...chikni chamelli, munnie, fevicol se....and list goes on. All pornography stuffs are easily accessible on TV.
All the movies depict that if somebody does any wrong to you, grab a gun and kill him, kill all who comes in your way. All these things looks good in reel life but unfortunately not in real life. The hero or person who gets killed in one movies comes out alive and strong in the next movies and sometimes in the same movie, but in real life a person once buried in the ground never comes back or the one who is burned into ashes never rise again like Pheonix bird.
News channels are also in my list. They broadcast news as a source of entertainment and for thier own TRP's.In a few days, there will be more sensational news. (Paris Hilton coming to India perhaps, who knows?) And the children, the rape victim will be forgotten. If I am not wrong they are forgotten.What happened to Arushi case which was once on every news channel 24*7. That case also suffered the same fate hundreds of cases of despicable crime has suffered - they fell into a void of nothingness. Well, let me put it this way no matter how big a splash you make in this world, whether your a Corey Feldman, Frankie Muniz, Justin Bieber...or gang raped badly or your innocent children are killed, eventually nobody gives a shit.

Society and Culture- Yes the same society of which we are a part of and the same culture which is believed to be headed by some spiritual leaders, who don't know what to speak and when to speak, but will constantly keep on giving speeches to be in the headlines of all news the channels and to be on page one of the newspapers. Yes the guess is absolutely right, no other then Spiritual Guru Asaramji Bapu. According to him Call your rapist "Bhaiya".
That ought to STOP THE RAPE!!
Wow! what a solution he has given. A person who never thought second time in inserting a rod in the vagina of that girl would have stopped by hearing the word bhaiya.
Thanks a lot Guru ji.

The suggestions of Khap Panchayats are also worth mentionable which includes
Don't eat chowmein.
Get married when you are 16years old.

The people will talk about this for a week or two and will make it a huge issue , then they get adjusted to their day to day life, leaving the girl and her family to suffer all alone and cope with this for the rest of her life and the guys will easily be out on bail. People will mourn for some days on the death of innocent children and show their sympathy and then will go for another event of their life. This is the only thing which people can expect.Nobody will ever think what that children might be thinking that day when they got up. They might be thinking what presents Santa will bring for them on Christmas. But they were unable to see that Christmas and their presents. When I was hearing the debates on this tragic incident someone said that guns don’t kill people, people do. I want to add here that
It’s true that guns don’t kill people, people do but “if I hit someone with a car, who do you blame? Me or the car?” One Jack Thompson Blames Gaming For Connecticut School Shooting.
Just like when the DPS girls MMS case brought and blamed technology in the witness box. I recall reading a very interesting remark there:
"The negative manifestations of technology are never stored on a chip. They live inside the nerves that carry these impulses to our brain."

We all say Mayans were wrong about their prediction that world will end in 2012. They were right.The world has already ended. Humans are still alive but humanity has died Because as far as I'm concerned, this is the end right here. When humanity fails,there's nothing to look forward to. All the education we've received, all the upbringing we've had, all the degrees we've religiously collected, all the Gods and Goddesses we believe in - amounts to precious little if at the end of the day,we're but as wild as a beast.

I apologize to all girls on behalf of all the men who stare, the men who strip women nude with their eyes inside lifts on a regular basis. I apologize for the men who justify such acts by pointing fingers at the clothes that women wear. I apologize for the police officer whose hungry eyes make you think twice about writing a complaint.But most of all, I apologize for the scarring trauma and pain my side of the sex has caused you. At the same time I apologize to the family of every victim of mass murder on the behalf of whole society, that we have given you the sympathy we can, we love to hear bad about other people. Its you only now who have to realize the truth and have to control yourself.
 -by a frustrated citizen of a morally dead world.

"The planet doesn't need more ‘successful people’. It desperately needs more peacemakers, storytellers and lovers of all kinds"
Dalai Lama

This post is part of the contest Who is to be blamed? on


  1. i really appreciate uh for ds ankit...uh include ol real facts dat r responsible 4 dese incidences..rather dan blaming a girl...hatts off for wat uh hv written...

  2. Wow!! Great thoughts Ankit. This is a real story you have narrated over here. Amazingly written ! !

    1. Thanks a lot Gursimran Singh
      it feels great to find you here...

  3. WOW!!!! Very strongly and very well written.
    Am impressed and amazed!


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